New Girl is one of those shows I just couldn’t give up on as I blossomed into adulthood. It just had a special place in my heart that was rooted deeper than any other show I started in high school. Jessica Day rationalized my level of weird and social anxiety. She made me wish I had an elementary school teacher like her. (And I’m sure school would have been slightly less traumatizing if I did.) She was sweet, fun, and just relatable enough that I’d still want to be her friend.

But, oh, Jess… Lovely, quirky Jessica Day… you lied to me.  Dating a guy with the persona of a barely-functioning old man is not as cute as she made it seem. And, who would’ve thought that sharing an apartment with a bunch of guys isn’t that fun? (Spoiler alert: I spent a year living with five grown men. I still live with four of them. We’re only friends when we’re drinking and nobody has fallen in love. Boring.)